Expectations

Alright, I'm sure there's some theory out there, I'm sure there are academic studies of why or why not expectations for your kids are good or bad. I'm sure my kids will need some couch time at some point when they get older. But darn it, when I take my kids out, I have some :-)

So, in the category of "Rants", I pass on this tale...a similar tale no doubt could be penned by any of us.

Wonder Woman and I were on a plane with a 3 kids, one of which I'll call BamBam - age 4, and a mom behind us. Wonder Woman had to move to a different seat because BamBam was literally beating her chair with his fists and feet. This was of course after he sang nonsense loudly for a period of time. Luckily, this all stopped when mom pulled out the electronic medicine, aka fancy gameboy of some variety, DS or something (I believe he at least 2 of them on the plane). Ritalin with batteries.

However as the plane began it's descent, mom had to turn off her iPod, fancy smartphone, and laptop and again deal with BamBam; she apparently is inflicted with the same computer virus as her child. He began screaming "I want my DS!!!" At first the straightforward approach, "I'm sorry honey you can't have it right now". Then, she tried the lying angle, "Honey, it's out of batteries". As the conversation continued, she said things like "Let's talk about this OK?", or "See...mommy had to turn off her iPod too", or "This is the rule of the plane honey." or "This is also the rule of the pilot, he says people can't do this right now." Hmmm, do you think any of this worked?

Now, we move on to the sibling interaction. As this went on, the princess child, the only girl who obviously seemed to have a shopping connection with the mom, called him a "Brat". Actually she was right. But this transformed the conversation from the DS to the sibling rivalry. I heard the "Don't we want to be friends?" line, followed by the "Let's say sorry" at which the daughter mumbled out a pretty good, "I'm sorry" (for what?) Now my favorite line, with the mom's prompting to "BamBam", "What do you have to say?"...."Nofing", said BamBam. I just about laughed out loud. Geez. As the plane landed, mom turned on the phone and never had it away from her ear even as I saw her pass baggage claim.

I as a parent have expectations for my child. I am the parent. So, in this case and many others, I heard more "I'm sorry" from the mom than I did from any child. And since the mom had no authority, she had to call on anyone around who had some. People often say when they find out we homeschool, usually while in the "I could never do that" wavelength, "I can't teach my kids, they'll never listen to me!!" Well, I'm not telling anybody to homeschool, that's not for everybody, but don't let that be your reason. You must have expectations for your kids, and by golly set the bar high.

So, an extreme example, yes. But as I reflected on the little superheros, I thanked God for them repeatedly. Then as I picked them up from Ms America and her driver who watched them while we were in Seattle, she commented "They do fight a lot, don't they!?!" Ooooops :-) Well, at least she says, "...but they work it out"

"Ordinary is not good enough. Normal will not change the world. We are No Ordinary People, created by No Ordinary God, for No Ordinary Purpose." Denise Mira